Christmas is coming…eek!
by Sonya
So I blinked and realised Christmas is not far away. Even though it feels like it was only February two weeks ago. Of course, not everyone celebrates Christmas, so I know Chanukah is also coming up. But also, you can substitute Christmas in this post for Deepavali, Navaratri, Eid al Fitr, Ridvan, Lunar New Year, or any other big occasion (sorry for those occasions I have missed out on). And probably for those of you who celebrate other occasions, each year it may also feel like it creeps up on you…or not. Time works in mysterious ways, and not just in the way they taught us at school (60 secs in a minute, 60 mins in an hour, 24 hours a day…you get the picture).
Anyway, Christmas and these occasions can have really positive associations. In my own personal experience, I love creating memories with my own children, and also memories from my own childhood spring up and take a life of their own. I grew up in a religious family where we didn’t believe in a man with a long white beard would come down the chimney bearing gifts. We ate lots of Filipino food very late at night (actually early in the morning) after attending midnight mass and stayed up well into the twilight hours only to do it again the next day. It was loud, it was chaotic, and I loved it. But not everyone did, and certainly not everyone does now.
But even if you are a lover of Christmas (however you celebrate) and other such big events, it isn’t quite as simple as what it was when you were six. There’s parties to negotiate, or parties that you wish you were invited to. There’s dinners that you might not want to be part of, and conversations with others that you haven’t seen for a year. There’s gifts that you might need to pretend you like, or even coaxing to spend time with people that you don’t feel comfortable around. There’s so many variables around such ‘big’ occasions that it might feel easier not to even try, and hope the time goes as quickly as the rest of my year went.
Now, don’t stop reading, there actually is some hope if it’s a difficult time for you to manage.
Here’s our ways to assist with coping through the “silly season” -
Self-care
Do things that make you feel good before and after events
Try to get good sleep during this time to have more
Drink lots of water. It keeps you hydrated and gives you regular bathroom breaks as time out
Consider booking in to see support people (health professionals, counsellors, online forums) to let others help you, even just for extra support around this time
Do something for others who don’t have as much as you - such as volunteer, donate your time, food or money, or walk a neighbour’s dog
With others
Let other trusted people that you’re feeling (stressed/anxious/bored/fearful) - if you don’t know how you’re feeling, but you’re not feeling your best, let someone know
Schedule down time as an escape. If you’re not at a familiar location, consider in advance if you can take a break in a bathroom, or by going for a walk, or sitting in the car
Bring food that you can eat if you’re not sure you will like what will be served
If not doing as much as you would like to be doing at this time
Connect with others online who feel the same
Spend the time engaging in activities that make you feel good
Rewatch your favourite TV series
And engage in your coping strategies
Bring your own sensory items to help (and if you don’t want others to see keep items in your pockets or wear them)
Download apps that can guide you through deep breathing or visualisation exercises when you’re taking a break
There’s no one magic way that works for everyone, and that’s ok. Use what you might find most helpful. And, if you notice things that are helpful for you that haven’t been listed here, let us know below!